oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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