Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
