idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Randomize
