No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Dicks are not precious.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
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