Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I need water and some morals
Randomize
