You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
