Texts From Last Night

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  (407): View more from Florida

  I'm so fucking centered right now

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  (407): I'm so fucking centered right now http://tfl.nu/fs64
  Replies (3) Good night (1571) Bad night (662)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"

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  (920): She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets" http://tfl.nu/73nd
  Replies (27) Good night (1097) Bad night (3493)
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  (571): View more from Virginia

  I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Da na na, na na naa

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  (571): I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background (202): Da na na, na na naa http://tfl.nu/9l4t
  Replies (35) Good night (3855) Bad night (644)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.

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  (240): oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie. http://tfl.nu/8aj5
  Replies (9) Good night (726) Bad night (3911)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.

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  (201): i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds. http://tfl.nu/tub0
  Replies (12) Good night (3144) Bad night (807)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Intervention is following me on twitter.

  (440): View more from Ohio

  wow.

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  (908): Intervention is following me on twitter. (440): wow. http://tfl.nu/4vti
  Replies (14) Good night (5384) Bad night (1565)
• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!

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  (212): Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?! http://tfl.nu/8o3k
  Replies (18) Good night (1380) Bad night (4670)
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  (510): View more from California

  I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms

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  (510): I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms http://tfl.nu/txtg
  Replies (1) Good night (1202) Bad night (2456)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.

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  (425): Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun. http://tfl.nu/x8cc
  Replies (13) Good night (2722) Bad night (1083)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face

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  (907): On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face http://tfl.nu/k6gh
  Replies (3) Good night (1558) Bad night (877)
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  (307): View more from Wyoming

  puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.

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  (307): puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done. http://tfl.nu/58vm
  Replies (3) Good night (2370) Bad night (754)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.

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  (914): Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73. http://tfl.nu/mdyq
  Replies (14) Good night (2824) Bad night (838)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.

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  (720): She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship. http://tfl.nu/wvbn
  Replies (15) Good night (595) Bad night (1507)
• Favorite

  (662): View more from Mississippi

  He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.

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  (662): He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it. http://tfl.nu/e1a5
  Replies (5) Good night (1228) Bad night (358)
• Favorite

  (661): View more from California

  He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx

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  (661): He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx http://tfl.nu/jwiw
  Replies (2) Good night (174) Bad night (367)

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