lets start a swedish sibling band together
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
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