OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
