My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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