so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
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