yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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