No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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