Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Randomize
