she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
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