I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Randomize
