He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
