Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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