It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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