I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
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