He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
