all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize