Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
