Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
he laminated a picture of his dick.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize