Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Blood and glitter go together right?
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize