i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
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asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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