I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
