is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize
