Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
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