You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
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I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
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And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize