8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
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