She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Randomize
