And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Randomize
