I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
Randomize
