I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
So much Jack, so little girl.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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