i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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