get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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