these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize