I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Randomize
