Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Randomize
