C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize