Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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