ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
i came on her dog
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
