I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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