I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
There are leaves in my underwear?
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
