If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
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