If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
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