I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize