Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
pray to the hookup gods
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize