You're my little dorito
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
