ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Randomize
