she woke up with a sticky ear
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
His hands were made for my vagina.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
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