butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Randomize
