its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
